To win the game, you must first initiate an Election. In order to do this, you must move into the center of the board. You may move into the center from any of the four Take Two Cards squares immediately after you have taken the effects of the cards.¹¹ Note that you must land exactly on a Take Two Cards square in order to use it as an access route to the center. They are not Major Squares, and as such you may not declare a stop at them.

 

Be sure that you’re ready to enter into an Election before you enter the center of the board, as there can be no turning back once you make the decision to go. Once you move to the center, the game will be over for you in a matter of moments—if you win the Election, the game will be over for everyone else as well.

When you move into the center of the board, you stride into the awesomely-lit cathedral-like space housing HappyCOM- 9’s Central Processing Unit. Long-dormant defense measures suddenly activate! Deafening acoustic cannons blare powerfully demotivational tones at your fragile skull! Antipersonnel darts are precision-fired into your seven chakras, disabling your etheric body and the large majority of your motor functions. As you collapse in confusion and pain, HappyCOM-9 stares down at you, grinning its hideous, soulless grin. The Election has begun.

To calculate your Voting Base, add your current Power, Intelligence and Influence. If you are playing the Short Game, in which HappyCOM-9’s Base Votes are set at 2,000 or lower, “cap” each individual Statistic at 1,500 when calculating your Voting Base (if any of them are over 1,500). If you are playing the Epic Game, with HappyCOM-9’s Base Votes set at 3,000 or higher, cap your Statistics at 2,000.

Break out the ten-sided Election Die and roll it three times. Read the result as a three-digit number, with the first roll providing the digit in the “ones place,” the second roll providing the digit in the “tens place,” and the third roll providing the digit in the “hundreds place.” Use the Election Workspace at the bottom of your Personal Data Form to help if necessary.

 

If you roll a “zero” on the Election Die, count it as a zero, not a ten.

 

An opponent—traditionally, the opponent who had the worst luck of the game—rolls the ten-sided die three times for HappyCOM-9’s Swing Votes, and adds this result to HappyCOM-9’s Base Votes to provide the Total Votes for HappyCOM-9.

 

If HappyCOM-9 rolls a "zero" on the Election Die, treat it as a ten.

 

If your Total Votes exceed HappyCOM-9’s, you have won the game.

If you lose, HappyCOM-9 goes into Kill Mode, activating its whirling blades and reducing you to a fine mist. All of your assets, including Possessions, Holdable cards, Arrest Warrants, and Scrip are all reabsorbed into the system. Clone Police swarm into the homes of your friends, family, followers, and acquaintances and detain them for “questioning.” The Network Archives are combed for any evidence of or allusion to you or your organization, and any found are erased. You are now considered to be out of play and will remain out of play until the start of your next turn. There may not ever be a next turn, because other players may challenge HappyCOM-9 in the Instant Runoff, covered below, but if the game continues, you will re-enter as an agent of the Clone Police. (See “Re-Entering the Game as the Clone Police,” page 19.)

If a player has lost an Election, any other player may choose to challenge HappyCOM-9 in an Instant Runoff election. HappyCOM-9 keeps the number of Total Votes it has, and the new contender calculates his or her Base Votes, rolls the Election Die three times to calculate Swing Votes, and the Election resolves a second time.

 

If more than one player wants to confront HappyCOM-9 in the Runoff, the player with the highest number of Base Votes goes first. Remember that if three or more players go out of play, HappyCOM-9’s victory condition will trigger, as described on page 13. This means that HappyCOM-9 may win the game before every player gets a shot in the Runoff.

If you win, the outpouring of support from the masses inspires you to stagger back to your feet, whereupon you bravely yank the Plug from HappyCOM-9’s Outlet. A terrible darkness falls across the City. Revel in your power over millions—if you like, you may describe what your first actions are as Exalted Decider, including the horrible vengeance you will wreak on your former opponents.

Don’t forget—after your victory declarations, describe the twist of fate that resurrects HappyCOM-9 as HappyCOM-10, who subsequently throws you out of office and has you and the other players executed for treason. Hey, it’s Inevitable.

 

Winner has to clean up.